searching for a guide through life

l.o.v.e. is sooo irrational. unlogical. no, i’m not in love. i’m just saying.. lol.

so, i talked to my godsis this evening. i haven’t talked to her in the longest time so it was good getting caught up with everything and whatnot. so she was telling me about the crazy happenings at her school (she’s a senior in hs), and she brought up this one boy who’s also a senior and nearly had 4 kids. he got 3 gurls pregnant – one birth being twins, the other being a single birth, and the third gurl having a miscarriage. maaannn. so her sis (my other godsis) was in the background and she’s talking to her too for a sec and so she drops homeboy’s name. and so i’m like “his name is ***? cuz i used to know a *** and he’d probably be a senior at your school by now.” (me finding that information out from previous research.) ha. hilarious. and so we chatted some more about the boy, rough description of what he looks like and all that, and it turns out it’s possible, but not totally possible, that this maybe could be the same *** i knew. then i go “yeah, the *** i knew – he was the first guy i fell in love with.”

ha. hilarious, man. i didn’t mention that he was not only the first but basically the only and that i was still overly stuck on all that to present time. yooo, what if this is the same boy? craziness, huh? and what’s even more, before knowing this, i wouldn’t have doubted him already getting a gurl pregnant by now. i know. horrible. but anything’s possible, right? oh, and what’s EVEN more, i still have love for him, regardless of anything. interesting…

in other news – the countdown is at 5-6 more days, depending on when my dad gets back from brazil. today was such a lazy, do-nothing-at-all day. i have a feeling tomorrow will be too. but i should do something productive with myself. i’ll set the alarms for early so possibly i can wash and set my hair, but i won’t bet on that. i’m not an early person. i need to work on that though. i’d do my hair tonight but for some reason it just seems weird because it’s 1 in the morning. i’d do it at home though, even if it were 3 in the morning. ha.

i want some recent magazines in my life! i am such a junkie. haven’t even completely read the old ones i have, but that’s so not the point. i need a bookstore in my life.

mmmmmmm, i’m ending this now.


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