searching for a guide through life

i don’t think that living alone will be all cute as it’s cracked up to be.

i am bored as all… but i’ll probably be going out soon. alone. unless i want to scoop by and pick up the godsisters… which actually sounds like a pretty good idea.. but which means i’d have to clean the house.. even though i don’t care and they don’t care.. but whatev..

ok, that was def. stream of conscious writing right there. but this is my journal right? lol.

anyways – i twisted my hair yesterday. and took pictures, of course… that’s what he gets for leaving me idle.. LOL! i ended up going through all the pictures on my computer. mmm, mmm, mmm.. i need to do something about all them.. haha. but it was cool looking back at the old pictures from freshman yr and such. i re-fell in love with my natural hair. thank goodness. cuz the girl was getting tempted to do something drastic. but yeah, i love my crazy, curly, nappy, soft head of hair.. so me and it are cool again. haha

speaking of being cool again – me and mr. monroe are pretty straight now. for the past three days i’ve been up all night talking with him on the phone. like we’ll start talking at midnight and hang up at 3am when we know we’re about to fall asleep or that we should have been asleep hours ago. i ❤ my homeboy. cuz i mean, he was going through some stuff and shut himself off from talking with me and i didn’t quite like it. but the one thing that still bothers me… ok, he can talk about girls he involved with and that’s totally cool with me… but then when I go and bring up certain guys, on comes the awkward silence. i hate that. and that’s how our convo ended yesterday. UGH.. men, they’re so daggone difficult at times. LOL. says the most difficult woman in the world.. haha. but hey, he’s supposed to be one of my BEST friends.. so why can’t i feel free to talk about missing my guy.. cuz i do miss him..

i almost told him that the other day.. but i said i miss everybody.. haha. he probably knew he was included.. lol. eww, i’m not trying to get attached to this man, but i dunno. i’m catching feelings. which wouldn’t be a bad thing if homie was hesitant when it comes to relationships. i swear, the thing we’re gonna go slow with is this?!


man… this break seemed sooo meaningless to me. it’s almost over and it seemed like just a big waste of time. and then me and my sister… mmm… what can i say to speak on that subject. i dunno, man, i just don’t know.

but hey, it’s a new year, right?



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