searching for a guide through life

woke up early for like the first time on break… i don’t know if i was dreaming about career stuff or something, but when i woke up, i was just laying in bed thinking about all these stuff about college courses, internships, jobs and career paths. so i jumped on the computer to do some research, and i was thinking how i’m hoping the rest of my college years would go and it hit me. college is almost halfway over for me! wow… i could have swore i’d have an extra year in addition to the two i have left.. haha.. it’s just that, with my major utilizing the summers, in terms of having an internship or media-related job, means a lot. i only have two summers left and this coming one is already taken with the Dow Jones internship. that means i only would have one summer during my undergrad years to choose from the many different wonderful, interesting, desired summer internship programs out there. i don’t like to go back in the past with any coulda/woulda/shouldas but perhaps i should have utilized last summer better (dang, perhaps i should’ve utilized this winter break better!). but then again, working at AES last summer taught me a lot.. plus it gave me material for my Dow Jones essay and such. i suppose it wasn’t such a bad summer.

there’s just so much i want to do. and i’m just realizing it all now… well, no.. it’s more like i knew it all along, but now i’m just believing that there can be some way i can actually DO it all. this semester should be interesting. it’s gonna be a challenge to see how i can handle managing all the things i want in my life right now – which includes doing well in school (i’m getting into my entrepreneurship minor this semester and i still need to maintain my grades – 4.0 status), getting a part time job, being active with my extra curriculars (the Script, Core AWE, NABJ?), finding a church home (and reading the Word on the regular), doing some type of community service, writing on my own (i’d like to start the novel or at least just start writing. i need the practice), keeping up with my social life (’cause aint no way i’m gonna let college pass me by without having fun and spending mucho quality time with my friends before life splits us all up; and social life also means going out and trying new things as well as pursuing this thing called a love.life ), and keeping my body healthy for 07 (i want to start working out regularly to help get in shape). i’m praying i can work through it all…

i still don’t really know what i want to do for the rest of my life.. or rather what i want to do after i graduate in two and a half years. i was talking with my uncle this weekend and he was telling me how i have to go to grad school. like there was no other option. i have to go to grad school and i can’t be messing with any boys until i graduate. i swear, my uncles are a trip. all them daggone tauruses. lol! but i dunno about all that mess.. initially my thought had been – i just want to graduate on time with my class and then find a job based on my major. but now recently i’m wondering what i want to do with my major after i graduate.. which has gotten me to thinking about careers that i’d love, which are related to my major in a way, but not necessarily the average path a Scripps Howard student would follow. because sometimes i don’t know if i really want to be a journalist anymore. that’s why i’m excited about the internships. they’ll give me some real life experience to see what i really want to get into. i’ve even been thinking about taking a semester off to intern. one of my best friends is doing that. she just moved to philly to do a co-op for johnson and johnson. she’ll probably end up graduating later, but she said that so many people at her school do anyway. my brother just finished undergrad one semester shy of graduating “on time.” i always had it stuck in my mind that i would graduate in the four years WITH my class. but not everyone runs the same path. and plus, with the credits i came to school with, i probably still could graduate spring 09. i might have to take 21 credits one semester and have a full 18 credit load senior year, but i could do it..

and if it’s possible to take a semester off, that’s gotten me to thinking about other things… like what about travelling abroad. oh gosh, that would be wonderful. but unfortunately, that’s not top priority in my life right now. i don’t have a 5-year plan or anything. heck, i don’t even have a 1-year plan. but travelling is kinda something extra. it’s not on the list. at least not yet.

but the birthday/spring break trip… i believe it’s on.  at least for me and my mom. i need to get my passport and i guess she has to renew hers. my grandfather said he’d take care of the rest of the arrangements. i should probably talk with him about all that soon. and even though i hate to take stuff from my parents/grandparents, how could i turn this down?! lol. plus, there’s only a matter on time, when everything will be on me… and then i’ll have dependants (my children..) depending on me.


well, this entry has been long enough. later gaters!



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  1. Nikkeeeeee!! look man, about that Church thing- a good way to start is to stop putting off when GOd offers u hints….i keep tellin u to try comin with me.

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