searching for a guide through life

prayer and planning. planning and prayer. that’s what i need to dedicate myself to right now.

soooo.. i’m “home” feeling the farthest from it. i don’t know why. i’ve lived here since i was five, but… i feel as though… i don’t belong. i think i’ve always felt that way here. it’s just… it was all i knew. it was my life. the life my family made for me. but now i’m coming into my own. own life, own family.

fierce and stubborn independence. that’s the liquid fire that runs through my veins. but no man, or woman, is an island.

i’m moving down south. next week. i got the internship. i want to look into an apartment, but i’ll probably end up staying with my grandparents by default. not that i wouldn’t enjoy living with my grandparents, it’s just that it’s very far from my job. and i’m ready to grow up, even if i’m not sure if i can.

leaps of faith…

last night, he pledged his heart to me. and i told him that love shouldn’t be something you need to try to do. love shouldn’t be work. a relationship, maybe. but love should be natural. right? right?

i don’t know. we’ll take it slow.

God knows… i love him.

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