searching for a guide through life

Boy, do I have a lot on my mind…. But then again, when don’t I?

I’ve enjoyed my lovely, quiet holiday weekend — even though I had to work a half-day Saturday — and although the work-week’s about to kick up again, I’m glad for the fact that it is a four-day week — and tomorrow might be a late day for me.

But gosh, can you believe that summer is (ceremoniously) over? It’s even dropped to under 70 on this Mississippi night, after getting all that rain and wind this weekend. The end of this year is near. Crazy! But for some reason, I’m looking forward to fall and to the holiday season, and of course, to the new year ahead of us. So much is to come!!

In just 8 months, 8 short months, we may very well be living in our own house. Cheers to homeownership! Of course, it makes me all kinds of nervous but I think it’s something real doable if we focus and work toward it. We’ve already been house hunting, which of course is making me all excited and anxious for the 8 months to come now. Oh, and I’m giving us 8 months, because that’s when the lease is up at our apartment. Of course, we could just renew it or find somewhere else to rent – apt or house – but my hunny’s been talking about us getting our own home for a while now and I’m finally convinced. 

I do want to make our home in the city we currently live, but as the months past, we’ll have to consider a few factors: our jobs, our family situation and our link to the community. I want us both to have stable jobs that we enjoy or at least have a plan to get to where we want still living in this location. This isn’t a NYC or even an Atlanta… if we can’t make our living here long-term, we’d have to rethink the location. Also – there’s the issue with me not being connected with anyone else here besides my husband-to-be. It worries me that if we needed to rely on someone in a situation like to watch our (future) dog while we’re out of town for the weekend or pick our kid up from summer camp because something at work ran late unexpectedly, there’d be no one to lean on. I also keep going back and forth on whether we are too far from where his daughter lives and if I’d be alright putting down roots somewhere where I love but sometimes feel so isolated. Sooooo…. those are some issues I need to resolve in the upcoming months. I need to get involved in church or a professional group or a non-profit or something. Hubby thinks he’s the only friend I need but having other pals – that’s needed sometimes too. I’m hoping to recruit my cousin to move here. She’s moving from VA in Dec and wants to live down South somewhere for a fresh start. 

There’s also a lot I want to do for myself personally and professionally. I bought poster board this afternoon to make a vision board and I will get on that soon. But it’s like time is ticking by and I have all these dreams in my head and then months and years pass and nothing’s changed to the effect I had hoped. I need to be more self disciplined and take charge of my life. It’s going to be a HELL of a challenge, but I know I can make it if I really put my mind to it. I have this feeling, there’s just something in the air these days that’s telling me that change is going to come.

Also around this time next year… I will be a month away to my wedding. Haha. I never thought I’d be one to be all dreamy-eyed about a wedding ceremony, but I kinda am. Well, I really am. I’m far from bridezilla or anything. I haven’t even made any arrangements or shared the news with most of my family. But I already have this vision in mind and I hope it comes true. 

Well… I could go on and on, but that’ll do for tonight.


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