A*North*Star

searching for a guide through life

Role Models

As a kid thinking about what it’d be like to be “grown,” I looked up to my Uncle Sterling’s children as role models. From the outside looking in, the way they did it seemed right. They all went to great colleges, graduated, became doctors and lawyers, got married, bought great homes and started beautiful families. Since my life was pretty straight-lined, cookie-cutter growing up, I thought my path would go just like that.

Sigh.

Maybe it’s just that I’m not there yet.

I want to be a great role model for my younger cousins, but what if things don’t turn out the way I expected. Out of my generation of the family — there were some late graduations, dropping out of school and deciding not to go to college just yet; there has been jail and evictions; lots of live-in boyfriend/girlfriend situations; no weddings and a few out-of-wedlock children; no one’s purchased a home yet; we can barely keep cars running. It hasn’t been ideal.

For what it’s worth, there’s a lot of love there and there’s a lot of promise. But … it’s not the way I thought it would be.

Has your life lived up to your role model’s?

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