My truth, my story, isn’t pretty. It isn’t bright or positive. And although it runs through my head 24-7 … it’s really hard to get out to share with another.
I’m holding out hope that God will get me through this. That is won’t always be this way.
I try to hold dear the good parts of my life. Cherish them with all I have.
And I eat junk food and sleep. And cry. And just keep pushing forward.
I have high hopes for my life. But often, in times like this, I just want to die. I just want my life, my being, to cease to exist. And I know my passing will cause pain. That’s really what stops me. That and my lack of courage. And my occasional hopes for my life. But I know time is a pretty good healer. In time, their pain of losing me will grow dull. They will make it through. And they will think back on me and my life and smile.